I admit, I’m not a Zen master. I have a quick temper and my bad temperament has reached whole new levels after being continuously and consistently bullied by a big group of LOSERS. Something about bullies, racists and douchebags that makes me blood boil and head explode. 🤯Bullies seem to have a very narcissistic worldview. They think its their right as obnoxious people to destroy perfectly happy content, young and smart (and not to mention helpful volunteer) women’s lives. They also think their targets are very jealous of them and this is how they justify their bullying/ provoking/ harassment/ constant need to prove themselves to their target and when you react, you are “jealous, crazy, aggressive”. LOL.😆🤷🏽♀️ Anyway, managing your emotions and controlling your behavior when faced with mannerless garbage is part of your appearance. Dressing well isn’t enough, you also need to behave well.
It can be challenging because bullies have literally no class whatsoever, so trying to stay classy and diplomatic is challenging. I have been provoked in the most disgusting, under the belt, low class tactics. You really need nerves of STEEL to have managed what I have managed by MYSELF. You can’t change an abnormal bully brain, the only rational thing you can do is to leave the situation.
So how HAVE I actually managed to control my urge to slap annoying people? Here is a short list of how I have managed to control myself while facing continuous abusive bullying and staying glamorous while doing it:
- Well I’m not a violent psycho for one. 😆
- Mental strength and being around racist and jealous mannerless people since I was a kid have really made my skin thick as an elephant and strong as steel. Nothing makes you ignore stupid shit better than being called the n-word, a gypsy, a boat refugee, and being spat in the face when you’re ONLY 10 years old. 👍🏼 (also why I’ll NEVER have kids in Finland.)
- Music helps to block annoying people’s whining. 🎶
- As a general thumb rule, if the person is worthless to you, then why do you even give a crap what that person thinks of you. 🗣
- Writing and rage tweeting help process negative emotions. Sometimes mean people really get to me, because they have no limit to how low they can go.
- Doing yoga. 🙏🏼
- Some people constantly interrupt you when you’re trying to talk to someone else, make vicious remarks or just have that annoying way of asking “What, can you repeat that?!!” about 5 TIMES in a row, it’s irritating. So sometimes you just have to tell them directly to leave you alone. These negative attention seekers are usually harmless, so you can just try to be nice about it. If it doesn’t work, talk to them in their own language. (Since sometimes it’s the only language they understand. Sigh. 🙄)
- The key to mastering your emotions is to realize the fact that these type of low level trash people who provoke, provoke and provoke for YEARS until they finally get you to snap is that they are jealous. They can’t manage their own emotions even for five minutes, so obviously semi- zen masters like me, are a HUGE threat to them. Especially if they’re racist and think you’re subhuman like in my case in Finland.
- Don’t fall for the crocodile tears. I have had so many people point fingers at me as the “bad, angry SINGLE woman” and they have adopted the “rescue me innocent mom/ dad” thing. This show is SO pathetic and the only people it will hurt in the end are their own children, family members or friends that they use as puppets just to prove a point how “evil” single childless Sonia is. So since I know their tactics, I try to control myself when they deliberately provoke me to show how “aggressive” I am. They should probably find a more interesting job or take a vacation or get a new wife/ husband and leave me alone.😆👍🏼
- Misogynists can also provoke women and then simply brand them “crazy”. Calling women crazy or broken are cheap tactics abusive men use to control their wives/ employees/ girlfriends. Don’t fall for their trap and get angry, but make sure to find evidence how insane those men really are. Sometimes, you don’t even need to lift a finger because most misogynists fall for their own trap in the end. Just wait for it. For example, my ex-boss always blamed women for everything and after all the evidence I collected against him, the CEO finally opened his eyes and believed me and not that man’s outrageous lies. 😂
- When someone always brags and tries to prove themselves to others, it’s a sign of weakness and low self-esteem. It’s easy to spot this and the simple way is just to smile it off. 🙃 You could also say “You don’t have to prove yourself to me, I believe you are happy without the constant need for my validation dear.” ☺️👍🏼
- People who are envious of you always think YOU are envious of them. Their car, their blonde hair, job, kids, money, spouse etc. whatever they can come up with when in reality they are jealous of your confidence and mental strength, because they themselves are insecure and try to hide it with bullshitting. Truly confident people don’t need to prove themselves and accuse single people of jealousy. This is just a cheap tactic of trying to validate their own low self-esteem when a “sad single woman” is “jealous”. Try to come up with something more original than accusing single people of jealousy. 😅
- Sometimes annoying bullies will claim that it’s “tough love” and you need to become “stronger”, grow a “thicker skin” when they simply torment and isolate you for fun. This is not ok and it’s challenging without a lawyer, so when the opportunity rises, sue them. Bullying is NEVER ok and it does NOT make you stronger. Never believe the bullies and their stupid ass crap excuses.
- If someone provokes you, scream, don’t hit. 😂 Unless you hit for self-defense. (Though I believe in Finland there are no self-defense laws) Physical violence is a crime, but if you say “fuck you” to someone who deliberately provoked you, you’re not breaking the law. Swearing in your mind is also a good tactic. Also if you must, use words that are funny not illegal (in defamation standards. Especially racists are SUPER sensitive of being called racist and have made it illegal in Finland now LOOOL🤣). Imagine some tough guy suing you because you called him “micropenis”. Even if he would win the case, he would need to explain to his friends why he sued you. 🤣😂😎
- Annoying someone is different than pushing someone. I have had crazy women “accidentally” bump into me in supermarkets and at work. AGAIN, these are cheap trash tactics to get a reaction from you and point fingers at you. Just remember, if they push/ touch you FIRST, you are reacting as self-defense. So better just stop right there pathetic bullies and get yourself a new hobby. 😆👍🏼