White Guys Stop Asking Mixed Race Women Out

I think I need to explain to white guys, that mixed race women are NOT white. We are 50 percent white.πŸ˜„ I may look white from the outside, but every white guy I’ve ever dated always seems equally surprised about my non-white features, such as darker pigmentation spots on my skin, dark under eyes and stretch marks. πŸ˜„ We all have our unique features from our heritage. I’m mixed with Indian and white.

Some men start gossiping when they find flaws in you. Some of these people seem to be fixated about my dark under eyes and other visible “flaws”. LOL.πŸ˜† Anyhow…Stop assuming that a young woman who lives in Finland will behave like a Finn, likes local food and all local things like ice hockey. 😫Mixed race people come from a MIXED cultural heritage, so obviously we also behave like that. ☺️So here are my thoughts about dating mixed race women:

  1. Don’t be a RACIST. πŸ˜‚ Just because you go out with an Indian-white mixed lady, doesn’t mean you can be racist towards black people or Chinese etc. Mixed people are usually very international and liberal and have a super international friend circle. So even if you don’t see her hanging out with Japanese people or Pakistanis, it doesn’t mean you can be racist towards them.
  2. Stop comparing your mixed race date to white women or other non-mixed people. We are mixed and we look mixed and you can’t change us, so either deal with it or find some other woman. 😊
  3. Stop finding “flaws” or be surprised that your mixed race date doesn’t have white features or has some ethnic features you don’t like. AGAIN, mixed people are NOT white and they are not the other race either. πŸ˜€ If you want to be sure, you can always ask about the features you’re curious about, BEFORE you get serious so there won’t be any “unpleasant” surprises. πŸ˜†
  4. Don’t freeze and sit like a mushroom when you meet her non-white parent. πŸ˜‚ If you are going to date a mixed race woman, you need to learn how to talk to ALL races. Or at least minimum the races of her parents. πŸ˜„ If you look at her parents arrogantly, then obviously it won’t work out in the long- term. Same goes for non-white guys talking to my white parent/ relatives. ☺️
  5. Be understanding of her background. She might have hidden traumas from experiencing racism at a very young age, something you have never HAD to experience. So even if you can’t relate to her traumas, try to be empathetic instead of getting angry or disappointed. She is trying her best and needs support and not constant judgement for being blunt about her traumas or hatred towards racist people. She is allowed to hate racism and be public about it. πŸ—£
  6. Growing up in two cultures makes mixed race people very adaptable and we try to pick the best features from each culture. So don’t be surprised if she loves sauna AND Indian food. πŸ˜ƒ Don’t assume things either. Just because she’s mixed with some “stereotypical” culture, doesn’t mean she is one. Nobody should actually. Just find out for yourself before making ANY assumptions and having any expectations.
  7. Do NOT try to change her to become a 100% something or 100% something else. If you can’t accept her mixed background, her mixed cultural habits and mixed cooking, then don’t even try to date her.
  8. Don’t accuse her of being racist towards white people! If she’s half white, chances are she’s NOT racist towards white people. πŸ˜‚πŸ€£ She might have been bullied by white racists A LOT, but it still doesn’t mean she hates her own heritage and relatives and ALL white people. She is allowed to hate racists though and you can’t tell her not to. 😝
  9. Be understanding about her need to travel and live in other countries and settling in some INTERNATIONAL city. She will NOT be happy in a tiny white town in the middle of nowhere or some tiny crap city that is NOWHERE even close to the international atmosphere of NYC, London or Paris. If you can’t understand what she wants in life then don’t try to force her to live somewhere she doesn’t want to be. She will only get depressed and then it’s your fault! The fact that so many men in Finland simply don’t care that I do NOT want to live here is a clear indication how insensitive they are to mixed race women’s feelings. FAIL. ✈️
  10. If you are not an international person or don’t have an international friend circle, don’t travel much or never lived abroad, then trust me, it won’t work out with a mixed race woman. International people prefer other international people, so if you are a hillbilly find another hillbilly. If you can’t find one, ask the mixed race woman to find you one. πŸ˜‰ πŸ‘πŸΌ

Of course, not all men are ill-mannered gossips though. I think it’s just the men who have been listening to douchebags for dating advice. Though some sweet guys have made me feel good about my flaws and these are the gems you need to find in your life. Unfortunately, the older you get, the more difficult it gets to find these gems. πŸ™ I live in a country where there are NONE of these gems. So hopefully I FINALLY get the chance to move to a big international city soon before I’m too old to have babies. πŸ€£πŸ˜‚

Mixed race relationships won’t work if you’re a racist. πŸ˜πŸ˜‰ (or live in a racist country.) Photo: Sonia Jain

2 thoughts on “White Guys Stop Asking Mixed Race Women Out

  1. I date a Finnish man from Kuopio. It has been a challenge for me and him. Things that I tell him, he doesn’t believe. People of color know when racism raises it’s ugly head just from experiences during their lifetime. I never view it as traumatic until reading this.
    Thank you Sonia for enlightening me. Even though I am 65 years old, I can still learn from someone much younger.
    For me, I am living my dream. I am living in a foreign country and am able to travel all over the world. It all depends on you context. When I was a little girl growing up in America on the wrong side of the tracks, I knew I was meant for better things. I wanted to live abroad. I am so happy that I am able to do this.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Aria for your comment! I’m glad someone finally steps up in Finland and says they have experienced the same things I have experienced and it’s not all my own imagination. πŸ˜€ Keep shining Aria, you’re a star! 🌺🌸🌻Sonia


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